So yesterday was the first day of my 'starvation' if you will :) I didn't find myself wanting to eat because I was hungry, more because everyone else around me was eating! We had a meeting first thing in the morning and all my co-workers were chowing down on candy the whole time and kept asking if I wanted some, not only did I decline because I had to but also because it was 9:30am and I didn't really want any, but at that moment I realized that I am a social eater. I probably have gained 30+ lbs simple from eating just because everyone else is eating! The only other thing I had a hard time with yesterday was being cold and REALLY wanting some hot cocoa, and it was my nephews birthday so I sang and then watched everyone else chow down on cake lol. I guess there are worse things in life right? I was extremely excited when I got on the scale today and I had lost 2.4 lbs!! That was enough motivation to get me through today (so far) I figure at this rate I should be around 20-30lbs lighter by the end of the month, which is absolutely insane! I'm going for the 30 that way if I gain a few back I wont be AS sad about it! This 2 liters of water a day is also a struggle, not so much the drinking it part, but the having to go pee every 20 mins super sucks! My boss probably thinks I'm crazy! I didn't tell anyone at work partly because they are all boys and partly because I'm still the new girl and I don't know them very well so its kind of out of place for me to announce that I will be on a VERY strict diet for the next month. Good thing I'll be driving for 15 hours on Halloween and wont be sitting there munching on candy waiting for trick or treaters :) Speaking of that drive I think that is the only thing that keeps me going these days, is the count down until I see Kasey again. I never knew it could be like this. Its so awful! I thought I would be just fine, but honestly I feel bad for any one that has to be around me! I snap at everything and I just want to sit around and not do anything. I find myself thinking what is the point of doing anything if he's not doing it with me? I think that's a good and bad thing! Good that I'm that in love with him that I just want to be with him all of the time but bad because he is almost becoming my addiction. I'm hoping that I'm only addicted because I hardly get to see him. I guess its like chocolate ice cream... I ALWAYS want chocolate ice cream but I hardly ever actually go and get it, so for weeks I'll be craving it and then as soon as its gone I start wanting it again because I know I wont actually get more for a month or so, and if someone asks me if I want vanilla I say no because I don't want to waste my ice cream joys on plain ol vanilla... WOW I can't believe I just compared my bf to ice cream lol... Things are going good though, I'm excited about losing weight, I'm counting down the days until this diet is over so that I can really work out again, and in 15 days I will be getting on a tiny little plane flying to KS to see Kasey, and this time not for 2 days but for 2 weeks!!! I can't hardly wait! He really is the best thing that's happened to me in a REALLY long time and I am so lucky to have someone that loves me so much and treats me so well! AND to top it all off he still puts up with all my crap! He is still going to heaven for that, I don't think I've met anyone so patient in my life!
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