Journal...

I originally thought that I would use my blog as a journal, a way to capture my life happening {which I've kind of done} but the thing I can't do is post some of the things going through my head. I don't think even if I had a real journal I'd be able to. I have things in there that I can't get out and I feel like I need to tell someone but I don't want a single soul to know, and even if someone did know it would do me no good so whats the point? I guess I need to figure out how to stop thoughts before I can focus on them. I'm really good at focusing on things and I need to change that! Well I need to learn to only focus on things that will make me better. I honestly believe that everything happens for a reason but its hard understand why sometimes. 

I need a day off....

I've been sitting here going back from my screen to the stacks of papers on my desk to thinking about photo shoots and back to emails then paperwork and so on... I've got 3 projects I'm working on, plus my daily work, 3 photo shoots to edit a shoot tonight and 2 more this weekend and all that I can think about is going out side and taking a nap in grass with the sun shining on me. I'm frustrated with where I am in life and where I want to be. My desktop background is a picture of Kasey and I on our wedding day and I catch myself staring at it a lot wishing I could just spend my entire day with him every day. I saw him this morning and I still miss him. I'm not sure how I lasted while he was in Iraq... I went 7 months with out anything but super crappy skype calls! I want to spend everyday sleeping in with my puppy and then taking pictures until I'm blue in the face then coming home to snuggle up with Kasey on the couch and watch stupid tv shows. I think was I really need is just a few days off from work. Time to spend in my yard and cleaning my house and having dinner ready by 5. I'm counting down the days until we go on summer vacation, I can't wait to be in Oregon & Washington just hanging out and maybe looking for our dream house! I guess I'll just have to settle for it almost being the weekend! 

No words...

Right now as I type, I'm listening to someone live online from Afghanistan... I just finished listening to the President speak to the country and the world, and I'm full of mixed feelings. 

Osama Bin Laden was killed by US forces today. 

I am overcome with joy, what sweet justice for the things he's done, and the innocent people he has killed! However I am a little reserved and a lot nervous! The Taliban will not just cry and move on, they will be furious and they WILL retaliate! The things that make me nervous are 1. the fact that Kasey still has 4 years that the ARMY can call him up for deployment, 2. I have a LOT of friends in the military still that are deployed and I am so worried for their safety! I also have things going through my mind about my religion, so many things have been happening lately that are talked about in the scriptures pointing towards the second coming of Christ. This makes me a little nervous because honestly, I'm not ready! I think I will relish in the joy and justice tonight and worry about the rest when it comes! 

What an amazing day in history, Something I'll never forget!

God Bless the USA & Let FREEDOM ring!!!!